Just Stay Away From Them… If You Can

By: Dan Kennedy on: May 31st, 2011 7 Comments

The Shadow knows. And so do I.

With another holiday weekend behind us, you may have encountered “friends”, family and relatives, and others with evil intent, conscious or not.

Some will attempt to slime you with GUILT. Simply because you are doing better than they, notwithstanding that you exhibit initiative and they exhibit none, they will attempt to guilt you into giving or loaning them money, paying their bills, repairing their car for them…or, at bare minimum, feeling queasy and uncomfortable about you own success.

They will advance their notion that you are “the LUCKY one” in the family, thus undeservedly more prosperous or happier than they. Whether they attempt extorting money or merely seek to “bring you down a peg” and s*** on your self-esteem doesn’t matter much.

Either way, they bear you ill will, they resent you. Welcome them into your home if you must, but dare not welcome them into your mind – or the mind of your spouse. (Incidentally, I encourage giving generously, but 100% voluntarily, and preferably to individuals who exhibit initiative.)

Some will attempt to tar you with DISRESPECT. Maybe it’s your brother The Doctor or his snooty trophy wife or pipe-smoking College Professor or the M.B.A., who is secretly jealous of your independence; who eagerly shines a spotlight on the odd and unexplainable nature of what you do as an entrepreneur or on the ugly, silly advertising and promotion you insist on doing.

As Mrs. Roosevelt said: no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. But that won’t stop them from trying. The cocktail party at your neighbor’s house might very well be infested with desperate, empty shells of men, vying for superiority by making others inferior. Small people try to be bigger by making others feel smaller.

Some will be eager to rub everyone else’s noses in their latest accomplishments – could be having remodeled their game room or traveled to Italy or bought matching new BMW’s or some such thing. When you hear it, think: DEBT. Unlike us, most of what these pompous show-offs’ll be showing off is financed to the hilt. Such one-upmanship is a juvenile game. Act as you would if playing chess or Monopoly® with a mere child; let him win.

Genuinely bright, successful serenely confident individuals play none of these games. They prefer talking about IDEAS, and seek out others who do the same. Find them and spend your time with them. And beware the rest.


Dan Kennedy is internationally recognized as the 'Millionaire Maker,' helping people in just about every category of business turn their ideas into fortunes. Dan's "No B.S." approach is refreshing amidst a world of small business marketing hype and enriches those who act on his advice. For more money-making marketing tips, tactics and strategies, go to www.GKIC.com

7 Responses

  1. Kerry says:


  2. Chris Rowe says:

    Dear Mr Kennedy, I am just starting out on the entrepreneurial path of discovery. I see probably thousands of workable business models but the main difference between success and failure seems to lie in the ability to take EFFECTIVE ACTION. I stopped watching TV and reading newspapers and most magazines a while back and after doing that the negative and apathetic comments of many of the people I work with seem if anything even more pronounced. Your posts are
    a real inspiration and a help in staying on track.

  3. Jorge says:

    Great article, lots of truths, harsh truths we need to be aware of.

    Thanks Dan, greetings from Mexico!

  4. Marc says:

    It was worth waiting 8 days.

  5. Nathan says:

    Hi Dan,

    This was perfectly timed, I’m just beginning to get some of these bad vibes now, good to hear that re-enforcement to not feel guilty.

    I could probably cut back on talking about my successes to the ‘wrong’ people as well.



  6. Great post – I love the part about “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. SO true and if you can figure out how to do that, it makes your life much less stressful.

    That’s how I’ve learned to deal w/ family :)

    (And idiot clients)

    Jeremy Reeves

  7. Sylvia Johnson says:

    Love this post, well said! Those attitudes come up again around the holiday season and what sense to hang around toxic people? Yes, have to be aware who you share your successes with not everyone has good intent and even some of the ones you’d think do.

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