Are You Embarrassed?

By: Brian Horn on: September 13th, 2010 5 Comments

Around me, the whiners, with the 512 reasons they cannot do well in today’s economy or in their businesses or in their lives.

One of the tremendous points of leverage for behavioral change we’ve been erasing from society is “shame.” People on food stamps aren’t ashamed about it. Obese people aren’t ashamed; they sue McDonalds. Pro athletes whose teams suck or who get caught gulping steroids aren’t ashamed.

One day on Dr. Phil, there was a young couple fighting; she, grossly overspending, an out of control shopaholic badly in need of a spanking. But the gripe she had about hubby was 100% legit: he had a mechanic’s job, brought home a small paycheck, and was blatantly unconcerned, unembarrassed, unashamed about its size, uninterested in doing anything to replace it with a bigger one.

Nothing shameful about being poor. Shameful to stay poor, in America.

Similarly, when a business owner is asked “How’s business?’ and he says “No good”, I think he ought to be ashamed of himself. Embarrassed.

When I wasn’t doing well, I was horribly embarrassed. It motivated me, because I hated being embarrassed. I still hate it. I truly hate not doing well, at anything.

What I see around me is too many people who are too accepting of what should be humiliating, making them miserable, angry and proactive. It seems obvious to me that the business owner who can’t eat or pee in peace without answering his cellphone….the doctor who can’t do good marketing “because his staff doesn’t like it”….the financial advisor or plumber not getting a ton of referrals….the salesman not making 6-figures or more….ought to be embarrassed.


Brian Horn, of HornDog Search Marketing, is recognized by many as the "Glazer-Kennedy Secret Weapon", because of his role in helping not only Dan Kennedy and Bill Glazer with search engine optimization and social media, but also many of the top Information Marketers in the world. Brian shares SEO tips for small businesses over at at his blog,

5 Responses

  1. Michael says:

    Absolutely. Just today I did an experiment in freedom (of time and mind).

    I walked my kids to school and my two year old daughter came along. As we walked home, I wanted to test my ability to just go with the flow – letting her decide what we do on the walk back, instead of me rushing her home because I “had to get to the office”. I didn’t have to.

    While my financial freedom isn’t entirely in place, I am mindful that this extra hour WAS available to me to make a choice. I was more embarrassed to realize how many times I DO rush onto the next thing, instead of enjoying sitting on the side of the road with my daughter watching cars and bikes go by.

  2. Ed Zaloudek says:

    I totally agree. Our society has run amuck. I t is a what can you give me that I do not have to work or do anything for.

  3. Rob Anspach says:

    Not only are they not ashamed, but some are encouraged by society to stop working and collect some entitlement program instead (welfare, food stamps, section 8,etc) – it’s a travesty!

  4. My would-be-embarrassment would come from not being able to support my wife in the way I told her I would before we got married.

    And Rob you’re absolutely right… for example – some people literally try to have more babies… so they can get more handouts from the government!

    It makes me sick.


  5. Mike says:

    it’s true what they say: “Some people won’t change until they are confronted with lots of pain while others are motivated by the pure pleasure of being all they can”. Those motivated enough to pursue progress make the best clients. They constantly ask: “How much better could things be?” They never settle for average. Thanks for the great post.

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